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The Wonder from Down Under!

F*ck I'm Good, Just Ask Me

Created on 2009-02-28 19:25:27 (#18875258), last updated 2009-04-26

837 comments received, 977 comments posted

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53 Journal Entries, 29 Tags, 25 Memories, 0 Virtual Gifts, 11 Userpics

Basic Info

Name:	George "Digger" Harkness
Birthdate:	05-19
Location:	Kansas, United States

Bio

Situations that Digger finds himself in are inspired by shows such as Dead Like Me, Ghostrider, Dead Zone, Gremlins, Twilight Zone, and many others as well as _cyber_bard and her characters in FP. Koan is an original character created by me, again based on the above.

NOTE: Please don't sue. I don't own this character. Fictional. Owned my DC. I just abuse him in much more fun ways than them.

Captain Boomerang is skilled in the area of creating and using complicated boomerangs of his own designs as weapons.

These are some of the boomerangs he has created.

Electro-boomerang Emit spark trails carrying a deadly 5,000 volts, which circle around the target.

Exploso-boomerang Detonates on contact, damage to all in one area.

Gas boomerang Monstrous intensity tear gas, affects one area.

Razor boomerang

Bladed boomerang

Acid-spewing boomerang

Sonic boomerang Excellent intensity sonic attack.

Gravity boomerang Creates local gravity field of Incredible intensity.

Weighted boomerangs Solid-weighted boomerang.

Preprogrammed boomerangs These boomerangs are rocket propelled and are preprogrammed to fly to a target, pick up whatever item and returned to a predesignated spot with amazing flight speed and range.

My house burned down in a flash of thunder.
My wife ran off with a one-legged plumber.
My crops fell dead when the riverbed went dry.
My dog got squashed by a pickup truck.
My son ran away and got hooked on drugs.
My daughter's knocked up by the class of '85.

People say that life is good;
It don't seem good to me.
I'm lost without a paddle,
And I'm headed up shit creek.
People say that life is fun,
But I don't know why.
As far as I can tell,
LIFE SUCKS then you die.

The government dumps its toxic waste
Right on top of my mother's grave.
A team of experts say it won't do her no harm.
But my sheep went crazy and killed my mule.
I cut off my dick with a power tool
Fixin' the hole where the meteor hit the barn.
(And it hurt, too!)

People say that life is good,
But I just piss and moan.
I got one foot on a banana peel,
The other in the Twilight Zone.
People say that life is fun,
But I don't know why.
As far as I can tell,
LIFE SUCKS then you die.

Let me hear some "yee-hah"s out there!

I went to the store to buy some shells.
My gun went off and blew the owner to hell.
Now I'm sittin' here in jail, singin' this song.
And one guy wants to cut me with a knife.
Another guy wants me to be his wife.
Hey, I wish they'd hang me before somethin' really goes wrong!

People say that life is good,
Give thanks for what you have.
When all you have is nothin',
Nothin' makes you glad.
People say that life is fun,
But I don't know why.
As far as I can tell,
LIFE SUCKS, then you die.
I said, people say that life is fun,
But I don't know why.
As far as I can tell,
LIFE SUCKS,
LIFE SUCKS
LIFE SUCKS, then you die.

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